A RECORDING BY ANTONY
I’ve been thinking all day about the moon. Is it an accident that women menstruate once a month and that the moon completes a cycle once a month? Are other animals synchronized in this way with the moon? My brother works in mental health, and he says that there’s a lot more hospitalizations and excitable activity among his clients during the full moon. It’s a known fact in mental health that people are more excitable around the full moon.
What about the fact that we’re made of 70% water? And that the ocean tides react to the cycles of the moon. Everything’s ticking around that moon. And if we’re 70% water I must be having some — at least homeopathic — relationship with the changing cycles of the moon.
I can’t escape my obsession with the idea that I’m made out of this place. I was raised to believe that I was constituted of spiritual matter that was from somewhere else, like Heaven or from a Sky God. Gore Vidal often talked about Sky Gods. In patriarchal monotheisms we all worship a God who has a plan for us in a “paradise elsewhere”. After we die there will be a paradise waiting for us in another dimension, and this physical world was just a work station where we could get all our ‘spiritual T’s crossed and our ‘I’s dotted before we qualified to enter a more significant spiritual dimension.
But I’m a witch. I actually de-baptized myself. What’s great about being transgender is you’re born with a natural religion. It applies almost across the board, no matter what culture or economic group or nation that you’re from — as a transperson you’re almost automatically a witch. None of the patriarchal monotheisms will have you. In many parts of the world you still are put to death.
Did you hear what our last Pope said a couple years ago on Christmas? He said that the marriage of gays and lesbians was as much a threat to the future of our world as the collapse of the rain forests. So, that gives you a sense — just an inkling to his approach to the homosexual question. And that’s just the homosexual question. He didn’t even address the transgender question. God knows what we’ve caused. I imagine he holds us responsible for all sorts of wars and strife — all manner of hurt.
I’m worried that the ecology of the world is collapsing and that I won’t have anywhere to be reborn. Where are any of us actually going when we die? Where have any of us ever gone? We’ve come back here in some form. Did you know that whales were once land roaming mammals? And then they crawled back into the ocean trying to find something to eat? Eventually their legs evolved into flippers.
I’ve been searching and searching for that little bit of my constitution that isn’t of this place and I still haven’t found it. Every atom of me, every element of me seems to resonate with and reflect the great world around me. So, I’ve come to the conclusion that this is God’s best idea — that this manifest world is the frontier of Her dream. From that point of view I can start to establish a new way to value the world that I’m a part of. Because if I’m not heading off to paradise elsewhere when I die, then I have more of a vested interest in observing a sustainable relationship with this place.
It’s a very indigenous idea that the Earth is a female, that the Earth menstruates, that the water of the world is the blood of a woman’s body and that’s what we crawled out of just in the same way that we crawled out of our mothers’ wombs. It’s the most basic idea; any child could come up with it, and it’s so obvious. And yet we’ve been straining for these Sky Gods for a couple thousand years now. I remember praying to God when I was six years old. I was raised Catholic and I prayed really hard, and I waited and waited to hear that summons. I think in a funny way, in a lot of my music I’m listening for that response still.
I’ve heard two rumors about the Dalai Lama. One is that he said he wasn’t going to be reincarnating because the world was going to be too dangerous. That’s probably just a rumor. But then I heard a far more interesting new rumor, which is that the Dalai Lama said the next time he incarnates it will be as a girl, which would be the first female Dalai Lama in the history of Buddhism. But I think that that is the most revolutionary thing he could possibly do and the most helpful spiritual gesture that he could make. I’m very interested in the feminization of the deities. I’m very interested in Jesus as a girl. I’m extremely interested in Allah as a woman. Buddha as a Mother.
I truly believe that unless we move into feminine systems of governance we don’t have a chance on this planet. The major religious institutions could usher in the dawning of a more feminine collective consciousness. I’m someone who’s looking for a reason to hope, and for me, hope looks like feminine systems of governance being instated throughout corporate, civil and spiritual life. It might sound far-fetched, but if you look at your own beliefs, just imagine how quickly you have accepted the idea that the ocean is rising and the ecology of our world is collapsing. We can actually imagine that more readily than we can imagine a switch from patriarchal to feminine systems of governance — a comparatively subtle shift in the way our society works.
It’s obviously a very broad statement — and of course Sarah Palin and Margaret Thatcher were evidence that women are just as capable as men of making decisions that are not in our best interests. However, it cannot be contested that Sarah Palin and Margaret Thatcher were both working very much within and in support of patriarchal systems. I just love that moment when Benazir Bhutto was being interviewed and she talked about motherhood and daughters and how she wished she’d have done more for the girls of her country. For as problematic as she was, Bhutto was an exciting forerunner.
Originally recorded in 2011